Collected Sorrow
Though I know I have felt hopeful
and grateful and joyful
all along my way,
I now understand
collected sorrow
has long been
a stealthy burden
and much of it
simply is not mine.
Some of it saturated deeply,
some beaded and pooled,
some already dripped away.
I think it will take a bit more time
to allow myself to let go
the responsibility,
to not feel as though
I’m falling short if
I choose to fully attend
to my authentic emotions,
whatever they may be.
What is truly imperative
is the recognition
that I’ve consistently acted
from a place of caring deeply,
being a helper,
wanting to create ease
for the ones I love.
This, however,
does not mean I must
absorb or carry
the despair of others,
causing unease
within me.
In truth, there is
nothing selfish
or nefarious
to that.
Sarah Carlson
October 28, 2021
Indeed... I too have been in this place, feeling responsible for other's pain, sorrow, other's choices; a "rescuer"/helper/enabler... It's hard to step back from those roles, identities,to disentangle ourselves emotionally, and not be or feel responsible for others... But for our own sanity sometimes it's very necessary to step back, which, as you say, doesn't mean we don't care... I am facing that right now... Lovely poem
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