Crisis

 

This photo was taken at the Borestone Mountain Audubon Sanctuary where I spent a day recently at the invitation of someone who works there. I had a wonderful time paddling, hiking, swimming, and learning the amazing history of this beautiful place. 

I chose this picture to partner with this poem because I felt so strong, supported, appreciated, and free that day. It reminds me of so many aspects of that which is good in this life, and in me, as I find my way through this challenging time.

Crisis - n. critical point, turning point,
crossroads, watershed, moment of truth

I woke up this morning
with this word in my mind.
I believe I’ve reached
one in my healing.
I remember this happening
many years ago as I dealt with
issues connected to a toxic building.
I made it through that
and this time I know I have
 an ever more solid
foundation of health on board.
But, right now I think it important
to admit that sometimes I’m scared
and feel alone.
When that happens
it can be hard to imagine
how I can go on.
Yet, I know I will.
Partnered with wave after wave
 of sadness
are currents of hope,
though harder to access right now.
Perhaps this is happening because I have time.
Retirement and this ongoing pandemic
have surely provided that.
I re-read my own poetry
and know it to be true.
I believe in all that has come from
exploring my depths.
So, I thought I’d write this one,
share these pivotal moments of truth
as I navigate this watershed,
fears and tears flowing free.
This is hard.
But, my vessel is still secure
and I trust that love will lead the way
through this murky disquiet
to calmer waters ahead.

Sarah Carlson
September 3, 2021