Shift and Sparkle

 Shift and Sparkle

Early morning sunshine at 
Jökulsárlón Glacier Lagoon.
We walk the paths,
marvel at the slow-moving beauty
unfolding before us.
This lake, filled with meltwater,
carries icebergs that continuously break
from the edge of a glacier,
then tip and tumble,
shift and sparkle,
slowly make their way to the sea. 

Delightful variations in their color,
many shades of gray and striking blues,
are the result of varied temperatures and ice density.
Once part of a whole,
each has a life of its own.

Our time there has been
in my heart since then.
Yesterday I experienced a letting go
that feels connected.
For many reasons that are
part of my own story,
I carried quite a cumbersome load,
much of which I have gingerly set down.
My body led the way yesterday,
and now my heart follows,
as I cry soft, multi-hued tears
of release and healing.
I don’t know why my brother and my husband
are not here to enjoy our children as adults
or our precious grandchildren -
and I am.
Unbeknownst to me,
somewhere deep down,
a sort of nebulous guilt was present.
Though it has been a slow process to realize this,
glacial really,
I am in awe of how good and safe it feels
to float and flow,
 buoyed by yet another
 sparkly, heart-mending shift.

Sarah Carlson
May 23, 2024