At some point during this phase I started to really notice the sky in new and insightful ways. I remember being in a kayak on a nearby lake and looking straight up into a cloud that was full of motion and energy. Dark and light layers with whisps of vapor curling away. I can still see it in my mind's eye. Another memory is one of biking home along a field and looking out over a beautiful fall sunset sky with so many vivid colors hugging the hills. Then there was an evening snowshoe outing with new friends under a sky just bursting with stars and moonlight bathing the snowscape. Those experiences, combined with continued inner energy work led to the writing of this piece.Inner Prism
Dense, jagged, penetrating blackness of fear
once consumed my core, pierced my aching heart,
took over an integral part of my being,
made me feel unsure, worthless, the reason
for all the loss and sorrow in my life.
A black whole that was so powerful, so strong -
still visits, perhaps as a reminder to make
the choice to turn toward the light, toward the marvelous
hues of healing, of goodness, of peace, of joy.
I’ve seen them, felt them, though they often dance along a
boundary long ago defined by things I could not control.
A gray, viscous boundary being challenged by the
ebbing and flowing of my searching soul, my wondering spirit.
Inner spirit that sees through eyes newly aware of
what is really there in the beauty of the natural world.
Eyes that look up to see puffy white clouds
with centers of gray swirling water vapor -
natural cinematic vision of the process of healing.
Darkness and light intermingled and entwined,
surrounded by the blue of a peaceful sky,
edges illuminated by the ever-faithful sun,
always there to provide for the silver lining.
Eyes that notice that sun set and provide a rainbow of colors,
reds, oranges, yellows, pinks that fill the sky,
spill over onto a myriad of green in the hills.
Colors of happiness, contentment, fulfillment, hope.
Kaleidoscope of color from without to within.
Eyes that see the majestic moon in a starlit sky,
and pause to look for patterns in the stars
in blackness that isn’t always quite black,
that can be soft and reassuring
when experienced in the company of good friends.
Eyes like prisms that refract and harness
those colors from without
to help overtake the inner blackness.
From without to within to conquer my fears.
darkness beaten back by the colors of light.
Dense, jagged, penetrating blackness of fear
once consumed my core, pierced my aching heart,
took over an integral part of my being,
made me feel unsure, worthless, the reason
for all the loss and sorrow in my life.
A black whole that was so powerful, so strong -
still visits, perhaps as a reminder to make
the choice to turn toward the light, toward the marvelous
hues of healing, of goodness, of peace, of joy.
I’ve seen them, felt them, though they often dance along a
boundary long ago defined by things I could not control.
A gray, viscous boundary being challenged by the
ebbing and flowing of my searching soul, my wondering spirit.
Inner spirit that sees through eyes newly aware of
what is really there in the beauty of the natural world.
Eyes that look up to see puffy white clouds
with centers of gray swirling water vapor -
natural cinematic vision of the process of healing.
Darkness and light intermingled and entwined,
surrounded by the blue of a peaceful sky,
edges illuminated by the ever-faithful sun,
always there to provide for the silver lining.
Eyes that notice that sun set and provide a rainbow of colors,
reds, oranges, yellows, pinks that fill the sky,
spill over onto a myriad of green in the hills.
Colors of happiness, contentment, fulfillment, hope.
Kaleidoscope of color from without to within.
Eyes that see the majestic moon in a starlit sky,
and pause to look for patterns in the stars
in blackness that isn’t always quite black,
that can be soft and reassuring
when experienced in the company of good friends.
Eyes like prisms that refract and harness
those colors from without
to help overtake the inner blackness.
From without to within to conquer my fears.
darkness beaten back by the colors of light.
Sarah Carlson
December 15, 2006
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