Finding my inner rhythm

Another friend of mine suggested that I try drumming with a group of local women who had started a frame drumming group. Again, as with polarity therapy, this was something I knew nothing about. My initial response is one that many people have when it comes to drumming, "I don't have rhythm. I wouldn't be able to do that!" But again I trusted and I found myself going to one of their practices. My friend very wisely put a tambourine into my hands and, before I knew it, I was following along.
The group didn't have a name at that point and after much brainstorming a name popped into my head that the group did eventually adopt - InnerRhythm. Since that time we have branched out (pun intented) into playing rhythms on both the tambourine and the tar. Many of us have also taken on the djembe.
One of the things I did soon after I joined the group was write - you guessed it - a poem that helped me internalize the four different drum strokes of the tambourine. They are based on the natural elements of earth, water, fire and air and we learn rhythms that combine them in many ways. Drumming has become another outlet for me and, at the time I discovered it 4 years ago, was an important aspect of my opening up.
And yes.... I did actually go outside this morning and put my drums in a tree in my front yard to take the above picture!

Universal Pulse

Kah, Earth, Kah, Earth.
Spinning planet, ground beneath us.
Rock solid, always there.
Kah, Earth, Kah, Earth.

Doum, Water, Doum, Water
Oceans, rivers, endless motion
Freezing, thawing. ebbing, flowing.
Doum, Water, Doum, Water.

Tak, Fire, Tak, Fire.
Smoke, flame, heat, warmth.
Molten core, boundless energy.
Tak, Fire, Tak, Fire.

Cha, Air, Cha, Air
Clouds, sky, wind, weather.
All around us. breathe deeply.
Cha, Air, Cha, Air

Kah, Doum, Tak, Cha.
Earth, Water, Fire, Air.
Nature’s elements, universal pulse.
Kah, Doum, Tak, Cha.

Sarah Carlson

October 2006

Drumming, among other things in my life, helped me deal with what I call the 'pendulum effect' of digging in and dealing with grief and sorrow.

Pendulum

Swinging wildly…
loving mother,
fearful child,
intuitive educator,
unsure youth,
confident woman,
uneasy adolescent.
When will I settle into me?

Back and forth…
trust - distrust,
faith - doubt,
power - helplessness,
confidence - confusion,
security - apprehension
love – fear.
When will I truly believe?

To and fro…
negative image,
radiant beauty,
withdrawn teammate,
competent leader,
deep fatigue,
boundless energy.
How can I find the balance?

Persistent pendulum…
lonely prisoner,
emerging friend,
off beat wanderer,
rhythmic drummer,
word weary warrior,
energetic poet.
How can I just be?
I just want to be…

Sarah Carlson

October 3, 2006